If you’re a single mom there is a good chance that you have encountered many supportive people and a wide variety of programs and financial supportive incentives geared toward helping you raise your child in a resource-rich environment.
Free from guilt and practically free from stigmatization
Single fathers, however, are often looked at weirdly and frowned upon by a large portion of folks throughout the world – stereotypes that will be addressed near the end of this post.
6 Amazing effects of being raised by a single dad include more focused parenting, improved routine, fewer mood swings, a stronger emphasis on chores, a clearer separation from a friend to parent, and a more carefree attitude. These qualities are highly desirable and make single dads much more likely to have positive developmental effects on the child they are raising.
Clearly, men and women are different in many ways, and this extends to virtually all areas including parental styles.
Having been raised by a single mom, I often wondered growing up what life would have been like IF I had been raised by my dad instead.
Out of curiosity, I did some digging and research the idea a bit further to come to the conclusion that these differences I had mentioned deserved a much clearer explanation.
More Focused Parenting:
You may be wondering what in the world is the term focused parenting.
Well, it’s well documented that men have a natural drive over women in certain areas especially when it comes to a single task, while women were superior over men when it comes to multitasking.
It’s not surprising to learn that as a single dad, once the commitment has been made to focus on the task of raising a child by themselves, that the child itself becomes the focus.
Of course, there will always be exceptions as many single moms can raise a child with equal or superior focus, however, averages count and I feel that single fathers have the edge in this area.
routine s are very important to children, and structure and routine allow the child to feel secure and safe knowing that they are being raised properly.
In fact, the importance of routines cannot be overstated as it benefits children in many ways::
- Feel safe and secure
- helps children and teenagers develop a sense of responsibility
- Develop healthy habits like brushing their teeth, getting some exercise, or washing their hands after using the washroom.
- Reduces stress levels because things are predictable and organized.
Routines are also important because it teaches kids the importance of responsibilities around the house, especially when it comes to chores.
By designating routine chores it helps children feel a sense of worth and accomplishment despite the fact that they may complain about it from time-to-time.
Fewer Mood Swings:
Most of you reading this post know whether you care to admit it or not that a huge difference between the sexes is that there is an emotional component that differentiates men and women.
Let’s face it, men tend to be more level-headed on average versus women – and if you factor in that “time of the month” men win hands down.
In a book titled “ how to cope with period pain gets in the way of parenting” the author outlines several steps in which mom can raise her children despite the effects of PMS getting involved.
I have not read the book, nor do I have any intention in doing so, but the title itself should be a clear indicator that parenting while menstruating has some significant challenges.
By no means am I making jest at the whole thing, and by any means do I fault women for having to go through this uncontrollable ordeal.
After all, there are some wonderful mothers out there that deserve to receive a huge shout out.
However, I am simply pointing out that in this department women do have some challenges over men that need to be addressed.
A Stronger Emphasis On Chores:
Chores are an important component in the overall development of a child. And if you’re not familiar with the benefits of chores and how it positively impacts them consider this:
- Chores help teach life skills
- Chores help in teaching teamwork
- Chores help build a strong work ethic
I could go on and on but the bottom line is that they are absolutely crucial and without this reinforcement, a child has a stronger possibility in veering down the wrong path and, in the very least, they become pampered lazy adults.
Now that we covered some basic facts about chores, let’s throw in the mix of how men reinforce this better than women.
In fact, I may be so bold as to say that although women may also agree with the necessity of them, they are more likely to receive pushback from children because they are viewed as less authoritative than men.
I know some of you women out there can site multiple examples on how I am wrong and this doesn’t always apply, and for the most part, I would agree.
But you cannot ignore the fact that children are more scared easily by men over women, and this fear component in itself is a strong motivator for kids to complete them when asked (or threatened).
In the end, a mother is more likely to yell, get frustrated, and either do them to get it out of the way or make excuses not to reinforce them.
A Clearer Separation From A Friend To Parent:
The issue, as I have observed, is that many mothers try to gain acceptance of their children as opposed to standing firm and drawing a line between being a parent and friendship.
Most of the time this stems from the inability to control their child – mainly sons – so they pamper and otherwise turn them into a friend instead.
As the male child matures in age, it’s also not uncommon for them to continue building the friendship by revealing secrets and venting their frustration about most things personal in their lives such as dating, girls’ night out, and other related areas that should be kept private.
Fathers, on the other hand, have a better grasp on this area revealing only what needs to be revealed serving only to help the child mature into a better man.
And daughters? Well, most single dads will always treat them like a princess which is a fault on its own.
Bottom line? Both sexes are guilty, however, mothers tend to rely mostly on emotional impulses whereas men rely mainly on logic and they tend to be more private.
Dads Tend To Not Sweat The Small Stuff:
It’s no secret that one of the differences between being raised by a single dad opposed to single moms is that men, in general, will not sweat the small stuff.
This is largely due to the respect a male receives over a female when it comes to parenting. If you have ever seen that old show Wait Until Your Father Gets Home, it illustrates beautifully how the mother is having difficulty coping with her children has to threaten them with their father when he gets home if they don’t start behaving.
For obvious reasons, many mothers will never admit this even if their life depended on it, but the fact remains that the dad has a more fearful presence and no amount of excuse-making and justifications will not change this fact.
As outlined, there are many benefits of being raised by a single dad. And although I outlined only 6 that really stood out, the truth is that there are literally many more that deserves an honorable mention.
I did not mean this post to be all about bashing single moms, as there are many benefits by being raised by them as well, it’s just that I wanted to illustrate the ones unique to single dads alone in an attempt to counteract all the negative stigmatization.
In closing, I would like to invite anyone reading my post to add their own thoughts and opinions in the comment section below.
Are you a single dad who would like to add to my research? If so I would love to hear from you. Even if you disagree with things that I said your thoughts are equally important as it helps me improve on any future blog posts.