Bullying has been a common dilemma for centuries. It is something many parents can probably relate to and even their parent’s parents. Hundreds of thousands of children can attest to experiencing bullying inside their schools. With the on slot and popularity of the internet, we can see cyberbullying becoming just as much of a problem if not more.
However, as parents, you send your child off to school to learn and further their education. It can become a major challenge for children to focus on their academic studies when they are anticipating bullying or some other form of confrontation. This puts them on the card and raises their anxiety levels while in class.
Although it would probably be nice to live in a world where people didn’t bully one another, we must keep in mind that we all coexist together.
It’s also important to factor in the emotions of a bully and why they choose to bully other kids. Instead, of getting angry, parents will probably benefit their children more by taking a different approach.
Usually, a parent’s first response to hearing their child being bullied is anger or frustration.
Many parents become enraged with school faculty for allowing such issues to persist, some parents get mad at the parents of the bully and some even become frustrated with the bully.
Unfortunately, there is no guaranteed way to stop every individual from bullying. However, there still are some effective ways your child can stop being bullied at school.
As parents, you want to do everything in your power to keep your child safe. You also know that you can’t sit through each class with your child and protect them from receiving negative comments.
This is why we trust school faculty and teachers to make sure kids are getting the best out of their schooling experience. However, it is also important to note that school staff can sometimes be the perpetrator of bullying. In such cases, what can you do to resolve these matters?
Here are 5 effective ways your child can stop being bullied at school:
1.Acknowledge Where Bullying Is Present:
One of the first steps to get your child to stop being bullied at school is to change their perspective on bullying. Some children might not tell their parents that they are experiencing bullying at school because they don’t want to feel embarrassed.
Some believe that by speaking about it, they are legitimizing it and making the bullying even more real.
This automatically would put them in the position of being a victim which some children do not want to be labeled. Encourage your child to tell an adult about the harassment at school. If they do not tell you, then they should at least know they can speak to a school counselor.
By speaking up about it, your child will get more insight into bullying and why some children perpetuate bullying. They can gain empathy for the other child that is bullying and not take it so personally.
Many times, children bully other kids because they have their own deep-seated emotional issues. It has nothing to do with the child being bullied in most cases.
If bullying is just coming from one child, then you can try to get in contact with that child’s parent and discuss the problem. You can also request a class transfer if that child continues to pose a problem for your child.
2. Encourage Your Child to Talk About It:
Instill values in your child so that they always feel comfortable to address these matters. You shouldn’t make jokes about your child’s bullying or minimize the effects of their bullying.
Experiencing bullying, whether physical or verbal, usually leaves a child with much emotional trauma and psychological damage. These hits on a child’s mental health can follow them all the way into adulthood.
Share your stories of school bullying with your child so that they can see they aren’t alone. Almost everyone who has been to a public school can say they’ve experienced bullying. It can be a hit to one’s self-esteem which is why not many people talk about their experiences.
By normalizing the commonality of bullying, your child won’t feel as though their experience is a taboo. This isn’t about accepting bullying itself. It’s about normalizing the discussion which should be had much more in the household.
When your child doesn’t talk about it, they tend to bottle up the emotions which will take a toll on their work performance and overall well-being.
Children sometimes act out in school or have major outbursts due to the bottling up of these ignored feelings. Thus, they can make themselves a target for further harassment.
3. Teach Your Child Not to React:
Many bullies bully solely to get a reaction out of the other child. They try to see how much they can get away with and how much of their dominance they can assert in the given situation.
For instance, a bully might take food off of your child’s tray to see if they will react or if they can get away with taking advantage of others. Or, they might harass your child to see how much control they have over your child’s emotions. Some children find amusement or humor out of this.
However, it is important for your child to learn not to react to these provocations as frustrated as they might be. Reacting can lead to a fight which can also result in them getting expelled. This doesn’t mean to allow the bully’s behavior. However, you must teach your child how to maturely handle these kinds of situations.
Behind reactive has a negative connotation in most cases because it sort of insinuates that a person lacks control to make a conscious decision. Instead, they are driven by their emotions at the time which can be dangerous.
Instead of reacting, your child should learn to respond effectively. Teach your child the countdown method where they take deep breaths and count down from 10 seconds.
This should be done before they do anything. It integrates more time for them to think clearly before they react in any way they may later regret.
Another way to help your child not to react is to disarm their buttons or triggers so that there is no way they can be provoked.
One reason that things get under our skin is that we have an inkling that what others are saying might be true.
You can help your child disarm their bullies by making them feel secure in themselves. So, if a kid says something about them, they won’t believe it because they’ll know it isn’t true.
Indeed, the bully’s statements will no longer have validity or meaning. ..
4.Restore Their Confidence:
Children are very aware and can pick up on things that even some adults might be too busy to see. Bullies can see where another child might be insecure or timid. Children who are shy or aren’t as outspoken tend to be bullied.
This is because the bully believes that the child won’t speak up to defend themselves regardless. Thus, they become an “easy target”. By restoring your child’s confidence and helping them to be more vocal, it’ll greatly reduce bullying.
Bullies typically don’t bully to spark a confrontation. It’s done mostly to get a rise out of the other child and make them feel superior. This is done because the bully lacks confidence and wants to make others around them feel just as bad about themselves.
I always recommend to parents whether their child is being bullied or not to enroll them into some type of martial arts class or self-defense.
By enrolling your child in some type of martial arts class, they will gain the necessary confidence required to become successful in many other areas in life.
Let’s face facts: there may come a time where your child may be put in a situation where no adults will be around, and they may be forced to defend themselves from some type of physical attack.
Personally, I want my child to have the skills and confidence to ensure they escape from serious physical and psychological harm.
Once your child understands this and has a healthy self-image, their self-esteem and psyche will be safe from the effects of bullying.
5.Teach Your Child to Use Their Voice:
As stated previously, bullies tend to go after the children who are more quiet or timid.
One of the 5 effective ways your child can stop being bullied at school is to teach your child how to stand up for themselves. A lot of the time ignoring a bully can be seen to them as a pass for their behavior to continue.
As adults, we vocalize our boundaries and our distaste if those boundaries are not being respected. Teach your child how to effectively speak to that other child in terms they can understand.
Sometimes all it takes is for the other child to know that their behavior is not acceptable and that they shouldn’t be so reckless with their actions.
Parents should always contact the school as an additional measure of prevention once they get informed of their child’s bullying. As much as we may like to instill strength into our children, they are still capable of feeling emotions.
These issues should be taken seriously in the school system. Always follow through and see to it that the issue doesn’t present itself again. Help your school to institute a No Bullying policy where there are consequences that reinforce this standard.
If there happens to be bullying or harassment on behalf of the school faculty, then take these concerns to your school board so that no other child is treated unfairly.
Often, parents who advocate and speak the loudest are often the ones who become agents of change
Although we can’t always watch what others are saying about our children, these 5 effective ways your child can stop being bullied at school definitely help reduce the issue of bullying significantly.
I was bullied for a couple of years (from grade 5 – grade 7), and I found the best way was to challenge the bully to a fight once I got to high school. Long story short, the bully backed off and I never had problems with him again!
Do you have any experience or stories about being bullied? If so, I would love to hear how you handled it!